The Long Road Of Pumping Is OVER!

As you know my twins have turned one officially! YAY! We all made it! Just kidding. Of course we did!

I finally stopped pumping. I can’t believe I made it a full year and two weeks. I slowed down quite a bit toward the end but I felt compelled to make it work. I exclusively pumped for my first child for about 14 months. I felt like I owed it to my twins to give them just as great of a start as I did with my firstborn. That was my sole driving factor. Along with the goal of making the one year mark. 

So, how do I feel? I’m ready to be done. Pumping takes up so much time and caring for an older child while caring for twins who are increasingly active is very difficult. 

What does it feel like to officially wean? A bit painful actually. My c-section scar has  been acting up although I’ve been crediting that to my increase pace while running… also the painful feeling of my nipples. It’s as if I’ve just started nursing they are sensitive and a lot of fabrics seem to bother me. 

Pumping for my twins has taught me quite a few things. I thought I knew it all after my first. Or at least all about how my body would respond. Wrong wrong wrong!!!! It was so different. My first child set me up for failure. He latched, it was easy, the end. Not so with my twins. They were born at 37 weeks gestation.

My little girl refused to nurse. The flow was too uncontrollable and as she has gotten older I’ve learned she prefers to do things in her own time and she prefers to control how she navigates this world… I can already sense she’s not going to want to hold hands on walks…lol, anyways. Gave it to her in a bottle and she was happy as a clam. She never did take to nursing. And nursing just one baby seemed so conflicting so I opted for exclusive pumping. I learned that not being the sole milk source wasn’t the end of the world and officially left the #breastisbest camp for the #fedisbest camp. We supplemented with formula. 

One thing as a mother you don’t realize is that if you don’t pump enough to have extra bottles on hand your significant other may feel entirely helpless and scared to take the babies out of the house without you. I didn’t know, but this is exactly how my husband felt. We went through 41 and 1/2 weeks with my first child and I exclusively nursed him and my husband felt as though he was not given the power to care for his own child. Isn’t that sad? And he never told me that he felt that way because it was important to me that we not allow our child to have formula. So while I loved feeling important and bonding with my child, my husband was struggling with his own parenting learning curve that I didn’t give much mind to. 

So remember feeding your child is a choice you need to make with your partner together and make sure you all feel good about the decision. You’ve carried this baby alone for 9 and 1/2 months. Let others help bear the load after they are born. My biggest piece of advice don’t be so hard on yourself if things don’t go as planned. The fact that you’re trying, learning, and continuing to seek the best for you child is what matters. Do the best you can!