After birthing my son I thought I was ready for my next pregnancy. I had this vision of myself totally rocking it. Instead I was sent into a whirlwind of the unknown. We ended up having twins…and that along with everything else seemed to make this pregnancy so different from my first. There were a few things that stood out to me that I feel I need to share.
“Roll over with your knees together.”
I don’t know how many different places I’ve read this…forums are riddled with “knowledgeable” women with condescending tones who’ve “been there”. From my own experience I can tell you, it’s NOT that simple. I had SPD (Symphysis Pubis Disfunction). With my hips separated at a painful distance lying on my side was very painful as my bones would click and smash together. When I would try to get up from a side-lying position the pain caused by lifting my legs was excruciating.
Luckily, I did figure out something that did work! If you’re lying on your side stretch your legs long. Then, carefully roll to your back. Separate your feet to about shoulder width apart, or whatever feels good. Then press into your feet and do a hip raise. When you lower yourself back down make sure you’re closed to the edge of your bed.
Once you are at the edge of your bed you can try to press your upper body off the bed with your arms. I don’t have any fancy tricks for this one. Some days it helped to move back to a semi-side-lying position and others not so much.
Also, I feel I have to mention I was not able to side sleep for most of my pregnancy. The babies were just too heavy and my hips were too painful when I needed to roll over. So, if you are anything like me grab every pillow under the sun for your bed and sleep in your recliner if you have one.
Skin Ridge on Low Belly
This one is a bit odd. Toward the end of my pregnancy with the twins I noticed I had a point or a ridge like bit of skin/fat on the center of my low belly. I was really freaked out. It took me a week of wondering and thinking to finally figure out what it was. I won’t leave you in suspense… It was because my belly was so big that it was sitting in my lap. When you put your legs together they don’t make a perfect tabletop. The part where your thighs touch is usually a little lower than the center of your leg. So there you have it!
The “Helpful” Friend or Family Members
This one isn’t necessarily odd so much as annoying and surprising. So many family members (you may experience it with your friends as well) would tell me what I should and should not do.
“You should not be picking up your toddler anymore.”
“You shouldn’t be doing laundry.”
“You should be resting.”
I understand that all of these comments were said because that person cared about me and my babies well being, but I also found them quite frustrating. If they had come with me to my doctors appointments they would have learned the following:
“You’ll know when you’ve reached your limits.”
“Keep moving! Cardiovascular health is good for you and the babies.”
“Try to keep as many of your regular activities as you can, within reason.”
Although my family members meant well I found their comments made me feel incapacitated and as if I was simply an incubator for the “real prize”. Toss in the fact that my third trimester was in the winter months and I had a serious case of the baby blues… or would it be called the bump blues? Who knows? Anyways, my point in sharing this is to hopefully deter you or others from commenting on how a pregnant woman “should” behave. Everyone has an opinion, but the only opinion that matters is the mama’s. She is still a person. She still has the ultimate authority over her choices. Please learn to respect those pregnant women around you. Their emotions are on an all time high and every one treats them as though they are incapable.